So i did it i took a line dancing class. Went all by myself. Was crazy nervous. The first 3 dances went pretty well. Then the instructor stepped it up. I started missing steps. I got discouraged. The first hour was for beginners. They didn’t look like beginners to me. Eventually i sat down and just watched. The women running the class were very kind. I shared my email . I found myself getting teared up when i gave her the paper back with my information.
I found myself doubting if i could do this. Then i was reminded what i say to my students. “Do it afraid” who are you going to hurt. No one. I want to go back next week and try it again. I’ll admit my hips are sore just from that little bit of movement. LOL
I see my therapist for the second Time this week. Ive had some time to look at myself a bit. I’m re-listening to a book by Mel Robins, “Let Them”. There were some things I’ve heard differently this time. You can’t change someone that is not willing to change. So true. I’m expecting my husband of 43yrs to be more sensitive, to listen to what i am saying about how i feel. I realized I’ve been doing this for a very long time. He said he was getting bored of this conversation. I am too. So that what I’m trying to recreate myself and find my strength. I’m going to try and venture out more on my own and no think about him. His approval. He really could care less.
We have 3 boys all grown and doing pretty well. 5 grandchildren. Communication has always been something I’ve tried to have with everyone in my family. I need to stop pushing. “LET THEM”. I need to “LET ME” feel calm in my own skin about what I’m doing. I need to release everyone else from my mind and take care of me.
This is not going to be easy.
Tides of me 